Not very lighthearted.

So far I have been trying to keep this blog very light hearted. Just letting people know whats going on etc. However it is time to write a post that wont be. I think I need to just complain. Its therapy for me. I have chosen not to write about Lucy Latta passing away til now. It is something that hurts me so much. I think the reason I was holding it away was because I felt like maybe I shouldnt be as upset as I am. But I am. I am upset. I am angry. I am hurting for her family. I just want answers. I know that she is a perfect little angel now in heaven, but why? Why let her fight so hard? Why let her go through so much, just to take her? Why did she not die of her disease, but from damage to her lungs? I guess I just thought it would never happen. That the bone marrow transplant would work and she would get better. The transplant did work. Why is she gone? Never once did I think that they would be coming home from Seattle without her. Never did I think that the little baby, only two weeks older then Grayden would die. I guess I was just in denial, like I am now. Its like its not real. However, I cry everyday. Im not sure why. Maybe its just the simple fact that I wouldnt know what to do with myself if I ever lost Grayden. I hurt for their family so much. I wish I knew what to do to help them. For those who have no idea what I am talking about... withloveforlucy.com